Throughout my life, I have often wished there to be a map of my life. I've wanted to know who I would marry, the children I would have, and the jobs I would hold. The most agonizing times have been those times that were filled with uncertainty and lack of direction. Particularly during those struggles, I have desired to know what will happen next. I have pleaded with God to just tell me or show me a sign. At those times I have been foolish in thinking that if I just "know" something, it will change the situation or make it better. Several months ago, I read a quote that a friend posted on their Facebook status. It is simplistic and yet speaks volumns to me. "The fact that God has a plan, not your knowledge of the plan, is the basis of your peace and hope." For most of my life, I have been kidding myself by thinking that knowing is important. It simply isn't. That's a really hard pill to swallow in a society where knowledge is power. The desire to know makes us as humans feel confident in ourselves and our own capabilities, when really we should just know God and rely on Him.
I've been chastised many times over the last few months in a tough situation for not being worried enough. Basically, my lack of worry and abundance of peace was very disconcerting for people in my family. I can't explain it any other way that to say that I was blessed with some of the first real peace I've ever experienced in my life. I chose to accept that peace and wear it proudly instead of casting it off for the selfish desire to know. All I really need to know of God, is how much He loves me, and that He does have a plan for my life. As long as I seek His wisdom and follow His will, that peace is all I need to KNOW!
